The Nightmares Come While I'm Awake

I don’t know if this is to her or to you, or to anyone. Who will read this? I hear no more news, and notice only the endless tide of those coming in to commune with her. I’ve gathered that the chaos is spreading and that the man that attacked me is still at large, still tormenting our city.

A police woman and a boy not even in middle school passed by, going to her. He is the youngest one yet to enter.

There can no longer be any explanation that lies within the realm of science, nor religion or mysticism of the sort that we know about. I confess that I have known this, explicitly and implicitly for long enough that I am ashamed. How could I break the confidence of Mr. Odo? What’s more, how could I have put to print what he revealed to me without ending up here sooner?

Not that it matters now. This will not be printed in my beloved paper. It will not be discovered by some hero that will save this city from self destruction. Perhaps when the ashes are sifted through someone will find this and be able to put together the truth.

Our lady Jane has a name, though it is as impersonal and impenetrable as the one she is sainted under. Cora means maiden, nothing more. Her time with us has been grossly extended, though why it should be so I cannot say.

The food no longer comes, and I am left in the cell with paper and pens and things they would not give in most imprisonment scenarios. I could hang myself, and am tempted to do so. There is no way that I will get out. No matter how much I shout. The other prisoner being held a few cells down died in his own filth yesterday. I’ve done my best to keep my mess away from myself, but these cells are not meant for long term imprisonment.

I will not get to see her, not get to see what made this all happen. As I look at the other man’s body, not yet attracting flies, I realize what this letter is. I will make an act of faith and believe that his body is rotting, and that mine will too. Whatever mystery lies beyond the threshold that our dear Jane straddles will soon be revealed to me. I believe it.

Arthur Manx